Never bring anise pods to a lobster-roll fight

Up in Gloucester, they know from lobster. Joey at Good Morning Gloucester lands a knockout blow on some foodie site that thinks "the perfect lobster roll" includes anise, lemongrass, ginger and arbol chiles:

Listen here anyone who would describe themselves as a “Foodie”. Do all us normal real folk a favor and spare us your stupid frickin lobster roll recipes that include anything other than a split top roll. Spare us your French baguettes, spare us your frickin lemon zest bullshit, spare us your ginger and your anise and your arbol chlis.

Hellooooo, we wanna taste the lobster. How hard is that to comprehend? If we wanted to eat Mexican we’d order a goddamned Burrito.

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Come on

If it was Howie it would have contained at least 3 Whiteys a Granny Warren and a mention of his new book..zzzzzzzzz

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I don't understand

I read their post, I read the posts they were posting about, and even read some more posts which were referenced and included the berating of other attempts at crafting new lobster rolls.

I don't understand the hate. They claim to be purists, yet they add mayo and eat it on a goddamn hot dog bun. Why not eat the thing plain if you're really such "purists"?

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yeah, exactly

By on

"We wanna taste the lobster!"

"OK Sal, backup the mayo truck..."

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To the Foodies

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What is a Foodie? Are you more foodish than the rest of us? You eat food really really well? So why aren't you an eatie?

You cook food well? Doesn't that make you a cook? Ok then a Chef?

It all sounds JUST a little pretentious to me.

Stupid foodies

ps. I'm in the Andrew Zimmern camp on this one. If it tastes good eat it.

http://cappyinboston.blogspot.com/

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Depends...

On your definition of "a little." In my experience, self-proclaimed "foodies" are among the most annoying yuppie sub-species. I'm a yuppie, I like food, but far be it for me to proclaim myself a greater judge of food than the next person.

Also, it's food for Chrissakes. Like the stuff we need to consume to live. Are there any "wateries" out there to judge the H2O we consume? Any "airies" to offer nonsensical critiques about the air we breath? Here's a tip - if you have to self-proclaim yourself to be the expert on a basic human need, maybe it's time to get a new hobby. And stop taking yourself so seriously.

Man, that rant felt good!

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You might be surprised

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"wateries" out there to judge the H2O we consume

There are certainly people who are obsessed with what is and isn't in the water they drink, and the composition of the container they consume it from, etc., as well as how much they drink, etc.

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Is that what a foodie really is, though?

I always understood a foodie to be someone who enjoys trying new things and going to new places, frequently (but not necessarily) off the beaten path and out of the mainstream.

What you describe sounds like an amateur food critic or a professional asshat.

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Yeah...

It seems to me that "foodie" is the nouveau riche version of gastronome. Most of my "foodie" friends are not food explorers; rather, they rave about places like Toro, Dali, and Eastern Standard. All fine spots to be sure, but hardly "off the beaten path."

I think Urban Dictionary pretty well nails it. And the fact that I am using UD to back my claims about other people being dbags probably makes me look like a dbag.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=foodie

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<3

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I loved that rant.

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Bahn Meh

The lemongrass ginger stuff sounds good to me. However, it sounds more like Lobster Bahn Me.

I don't find anything wrong with that, but upscaling simple, good food can get silly silly.

An old school Lobstah Roll sounds good, too - in fact, the dressed up ones for big $$$ just make me want one of the far less expensive, usually far fresher originals. I usually grab one as lunch when biking along a shoreline, which raises the ambiance points. Not picky about the bread, so long as it is white, doused in butter, and grilled.

Although one would think that the purveyors of a product would happily approve of it being put to whatever use raises their bottom line.

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Pricing

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That there are restaurants that feel it is OK to charge $20 for a plain old lobster roll is the real crime.

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You've probably seen the term "market price"

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when you buy a lobster roll or other seafood? I'm all for fishermen getting a fair shake but I don't think most restaurants are like "heh heh--let's slap it on a hotdog roll and charge $20 for this $2 lobster we just bought." It costs what it costs.

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That's exactly what they do

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They have their costs to cover, but a lot of restaurants charge what they can get away with.

If it is because they are "fine dining", they might pay a bit more or get a better quality of ingredient...but not usually for the up charge that makes a $5 pork chop into a $25 pork chop.

If it is because "lobster is always expensive", then they will charge $30 for the lobster roll even though the same amount of lobster is only $5/lb in the store right now.

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Lobstermen aren't cleaning up

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A lobsterman traditionally gets $2-$4 per pound off the boat. An excellent lobster roll MIGHT have all of the meat from a 1-1/4 pound lobster in it, but more likely doesn't. That is, maximum, $6 to the lobsterman, the rest to the distributor and the restaurant. I'm 31 years old. I never bought a lobster at a restaurant until a year ago because I know it's highway robbery. Even when lobster is selling for $5-$6 a pound retail you can't find one at a restaurant for less than $20. It's the biggest ripoff in the restaurant industry, but as long as tourists will keep paying for it people will keep buying them.

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That recipe was kinda

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That recipe was kinda overboard with ingredients , who has all that stuff anyway ? Kept it simple. Do they still try to pawn off the langostino as lobster any more ?

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Really?

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Yes. because that's all Mexicans eat. #MoreInternetBickeringPLEASE

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With a comment like this:

"Hellooooo, we wanna taste the lobster. How hard is that to comprehend? If we wanted to eat Mexican we’d order a goddamned Burrito."

Not internet is needed for more bickering. I'd most definitely bring this up in any other realm.

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Burrito is one example

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I guess he should have listed every single Mexican food so people like you wouldn't assume something completely ridiculous?

You're right. I can see how you took that quote to mean all Mexican people eat ONLY burritos.

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Not really

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They are from Northern Mexico, where wheat is more commonly grown than corn.

Northern Mexico just used to include Texas.

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Food purism is okay up to a point

I happen to agree with the ranter's preference for relative simplicity in a lobster roll. But he loses me immediately when he talks about "The Rules of Lobster Roll Making", to say nothing of his crude barnyard analogy later on. Screw that noise.

If a group of self-appointed experts were allowed to tell chefs how things Must Be Done Because That's the Way They've Always Been Done, cuisine would never evolve. Chefs have been taking refined food and making it simple, elevating street food to the realm of the gourmet, and doing mashups of traditional cuisines from around the world forever, and that's a very good thing. Judge food on whether you like the way it tastes, not on how well it conforms to some imaginary canon. Recipe fundamentalism is for knuckleheads.

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YES

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That's why I put Star Anise fruit and Kumquats in everything I make.
NO one is telling me how to make microwave popcorn especially no Foodie or Long shore fisherman from Gloucester.

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Star Anise

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Doesn't do enough for milk snorting pre-teens alone?

(* an us ...)

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Hmm, my inner 12-year-old didn't immediately guffaw at that one

But I'd further point out that in the recipe that got Gloucester Man all in a lather, the aromatics are going into the water the lobsters are being cooked in; I can't imagine that a lot of the flavor survives once the critters are shelled, and the recipe calls for only two teaspoons of that broth to be added to the salad.

He just don't like the sound of them weird foo-foo Whole Food / Chinese market kind of ingredients, never mind that they probably barely register in the final product.

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Lobster schmobster

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If I want to eat exoskeleton aquatic life forms I'll eat crabs. Blue shell, steamed with Old Bay seasoning, water or beer. An everyman's feast fit for a king, eaten without fancy bib, on newspaper, with a mallet and knife.

No need to dip in butter and a heck of a lot cheaper.

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What?

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Here in Boston even if we believe that to be true we do not admit that.

Lobster trumps all crustaceans.

Sacrilege!!!

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