The great Medford chicken roundup

Sophy Tuttle has quite the tale of what happened on her normally sedate Medford side street this morning when a drunken college student, on learning Tuttle's downstairs neighbor had packed three dozen chickens, a number of geese and ducks and an undetermined number of pigs in a trailer parked in the street, got a hammer and whacked the trailer open (all the while screaming "I know what I'm doing, my girlfriend goes to Tufts!"), releasing all the birds into the street (the pigs just stayed where they were):

I was woken up at 4:30 to the cops banging on our door screaming "Are these your f*%$ing chickens?!?!" "Get the F*%^ out here and get them!". My neighbor runs out and starts screaming at the kid. My next door neighbors and the farmer and his wife now spend the next 2 hours chasing chickens and ducks allll over my neighborhood, all while screaming like it's not 5am. While the kid is sitting in cuffs on my porch, the cop says "are you a college student?", to which the moron replies, "yea, I go to college". The cop replies, "that's why then. All you college kids are f*&%ing idiots". My roommates and I are standing on the porch, watching about 5 seasoned police officers chase chickens on a suburban street at 5 am and trying not to laugh, because, you know, they have guns.

H/t Greg Cook.

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    Is this supposed to be funny?

    By on

    Is this supposed to be funny? Keeping animals in a trailer? Banging on the trailer with a hammer?

    Sounds abusive not at all funny.

    Yes, everything about this is sad

    By on

    Animals locked up in a trailer: Sad.
    Drunken man banging on something in the street with a hammer at 4 a.m.: Sad.
    Most of the city police force running around before dawn: Sad.

    And yet, put them all together and you have an absolutely insane story, one that obviously I found worth posting about.

    Depends on the trailer. A lot

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    Depends on the trailer. A lot of chicken coops are built on trailers so you can move them around. I don't know about pigs though. Either way, I'm logging this in the hilarious category.

    Trailer = shed with wheels

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    Abusive? That's a bit of an assumption. There's not enough details in this account to know - but if the animals had sufficient water, airflow and proper bedding, there's no reason a trailer couldn't be a humane place to keep them on a cold December evening. As a farm boy I saw plenty of perfectly fine small-animal sheds not much bigger than a trailer.

    (Story is still hilarious, though.)

    Unless you are a vegetarian...

    ... the animals you eat have undoubtedly been packed into a trailer at some point in their lives. And the articles seems to state that the vandal wasn't banging on the trailer with a hammer to harass the animals, but rather to get the lock open.

    lmao

    "i know what im doing, my girlfriend goes to tufts"

    classic

    also, she seemingly has better taste in schools than in men

    Meanwhile ...

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    Mr. Green Jeans doesn't seem to have any lights on in the head office himself to bring these animals into an area of 3000 square foot lots with 1 to 3 family houses and leave them there on a freezing night.

    As the poster noted in comments, the college student is "a drunk with some empathy".

    Note that our neighborhood isn't exactly college-student heavy in the least.

    This reminds me of that video from a few years ago...

    By on

    Wasn't that woman who made the "I got news for you, college students, no one likes you....you'll move to Concid [Concord], have a kid at 50" from Medford?

    Also, wasn't it the Medford Police who were carrying the Trump and Clinton effigies (Clinton being in handcuffs) while in their duty uniforms?

    If my memory on either or both of these is correct, this chicken incident seems almost destined to have happened.

    Not effigies

    I also forget if it was Medford but I think the incident you're referring to was cops posing with people in those Halloween costumes.

    yep, that's the place

    I hope the Trumperds consider it to be their shining moment in being red state Americans, chasing livestock at night.

    A real downhome experience.

    Oh my!

    Too damn funny. A confederacy of dunces, to be true!

    It would be even funnier if they rounded up one of the Playstead turkeys in this fowl endeavor.

    classic

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    "are you a college student?", to which the moron replies, "yea, I go to college". The cop replies, "that's why then. All you college kids are f*&%ing idiots".

    this just made my day, and the story IS funny.ive been reading about people killing their mothers and kids being beheaded the last two days so yeah this is a funny story.

    Depends how you take it

    If you take the police statement as being about age, it's funny (and true, I was certainly an idiot when I was in college, et tu?)

    If you take it as being part of a larger class war, it's unfortunate.

    College kids are idiots

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    I think that now. I thought that while in college. I even thought that while in high school.

    That's the difference between growing up in a college town and where you grew up.

    Cue the Benny Hill theme

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    And I felt bad enough when I had to call the Medford Police on a pack of 9 year olds stealing packages from my porch.

    MPD get to deal with an interesting mix of both city and suburbia.

    I hope all the chickens survived without anything more than mental injuries.

    Hilarious

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    This is awesome. If I was on the the porch watching I'd probably get lugged by the cops for laughing. "You think this is funny? You're coming with us.."

    Someone call Arlo Guthrie

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    and I want to know if there were 8x10 color glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one.

    << I was woken up at 4:30 to

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    << I was woken up at 4:30 to the cops banging on our door screaming "Are these your f*%$ing chickens?!?!" "Get the F*%^ out here and get them!". >>

    More good community relations from the Medford police. Is waking citizens up in the dead of night and swearing at them official protocol? I suppose if you asked those cops, it's the animals' owner's fault that they went to bed and didn't anticipate they'd be released into the street overnight.

    The right way to do it: "sorry to bother you, but do you know who owns the chickens and geese out here? They're going to have to come out and help us round them up".

    Well, actually ...

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    I suppose if you asked those cops, it's the animals' owner's fault that they went to bed and didn't anticipate they'd be released into the street overnight.

    I suspect, yeah, that is kind of the deal, especially in a city, where people don't normally store chickens, ducks, geese and pigs in a trailer outside their houses.