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In Brighton, tree-killing ninja now has to compete with serial tickler for police attention

Boston.com reports on the neighborhood's latest weird criminal.

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Seriously, kids? LOCK your doors!

Quotes from the article, emphasis, mine:

a month before his roommate’s encounter, he heard shuffling at the door to his room and saw a man there in a Gator-style ski mask.

All of these students, and others in the neighborhood, said they would like to see more of a police presence.

“I’d really like it and probably feel safer if BPD had a patrol car off campus every night,” Goldowsky said.

Barrows said there are more police in the neighborhood on nights when students have parties than at other times.

“I don’t think there is much that can be done, but hopefully the Boston police can throw a few more police around at weird times instead of just a million cops on Friday and Saturday nights, then one on Sunday night,” he said.

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Seriously.

I think much crime in that cohort could be stopped by following these simple rules:

1. Don't get fall-down, pass-out wasted drunk.
2. Lock your doors.

Although, some witnesses have reported that this guy has been peeping through windows watching them having sex. Kinda reminds me of that guy over in Allendale or Brookline (?) who was peeping through windows a couple years ago.

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The case of the serial foot tickler who breaks in through UNLOCKED doors.

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I am very worried.

Not because my sensitive funny-regions or those of my loved ones might be at risk, but because it took a full five correspondents to produce that 800-word story.

Five.

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One writer's name is awfully similar to Bram Stoker. I wonder whether the Tickler comes out only at night? Or might this be The Tickler evolved into a hominoid form? The number of coincidental horror references is disconcerting.

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I couldn't decide whether I was more troubled by that or by the fact that students at an allegedly elite college are not smart enough to lock their doors at night.

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Is the tickler French?

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People thought Polyester was fiction. It's good to know that Boston has some of the same peculiar people as Baltimore - whether as fact or fiction. Dexter the Foot Stomper lives!

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A Louisville Slugger-to-the-kneecap ninja for these two (expletives.)

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