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Getting off on the train
By adamg on Fri, 09/23/2005 - 2:00pm
Sarah gets that Emily Post feeling when she notices the young couple across from her on the Red Line making out. At 7:45 in the morning:
... I just don't need to hear wet, sucking sounds while I try and look away as his hand moves from her face down her neck and to her breast/shoulder. ...
But it gets even better when a male acquaintance of theirs gets on at Central and snuggles in.
Meanwhile, over on the Orange Line, idreamlikethis reports:
... When I got on the orange line at north station, I happened to sit in front of a couple that was making out, and doing some REALLY heavy petting. On a fucking crowded train. They were gropping eachother, and put their hands down one anothers pants. It was fucked up. I had to get up and move, because it was gross. They were in their 40s too. ewwwwww. ...
Ed. note: Yes, of course, people over 40 should never leave the retirement home. Don't they know what they look like?
Ed. ed. note: The above ed. note was meant to be a sarcastic comment on the way the poster seemed as disgusted by the couple's apparent age as by what they were doing. It was NOT meant to be a crack about people actually over 40, which would be wicked stupid, given that I am part of that demographic.
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Comments
Old Enough to Know Better
Well, those over-forty-types can look pretty darn ridiculous when they're engaging in heavy petting in public. Was actually almost run over at the Mass Ave and Marlborough intersection when a couple were too busy groping one another to notice that a.) there was a stop sign and b.)I was in the crosswalk at the time. Was sooo satisfying to look all sternly at them and tell them that they were old enough to know better.
Yeah, but ...
I don't think the correspondent was thinking that - I think she was thinking about how wrinkly they were, and gosh, her parents NEVER had sex, even before she was born, guh-ross!
!!!
(snort) after having read the correspondent's post, it occurred to me that she might well be young enough to be my daughter. Talk about having an eww moment.
Doesn't this person know 40
Doesn't this person know 40 is the new 30? Jeeeeesus! Such ageism.
We need to start a movement
I've got the perfect motto:
"Don't trust anyone under 40!"
The solution
I've had that happen to me on commuter rail; the teenage couple in front of me was practically shedding clothing. My solution was to lean over, and gently point out: "You do realize that, even though this seat back is between you and the rest of us, that we can all actually still see you? That you're not in some sort of private compartment?" They seemed appropriately chastised.
Which was too bad, because my planned next step was gonna be even more fun - continue propping my chin on the seat, like the annoying neighbor on the fence, and strike up an increasingly creepy conversation at close range. "So, what cha doing? How long have you been dating? That's sweet. Do you always stick your left hand there, or is it the right sometimes? What color pants are they usually? No kidding, my mom loves purple... this is totally hot, by the way, please don't stop on my account. In fact, I found this web site the other day - it doesn't cost TOO much - and..."
LOL!
LOL!