Globe Metro columnists set their sights low
By adamg - Fri, 03/06/2009 - 8:02am.
Yesterday, Kevin Cullen declared Boston the Worst City in the World because we haven't seen fit to temporarily rename a street after some rock band that played here once. Hey, Kevin, I'm personally outraged there's no plaque commemorating the time the seminal rock band the B-52s played the Orpheum back in the early 1980s, whom can I call, and can I count on your support?
Today, Adrian Walker does one of his patented rewrite jobs and explains that a) There's a big hole in the middle of Downtown Crossing, b) Tom Menino refused to walk by it the other day and c) The city's in a heap of financial trouble. Absolutely none of which we'd read in any Globe stories over the past week, right?
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I'm outraged!
Outraged, I tell you! I can't believe we don't have a street named after the B-52's! (Actually, that'd be nizzer keen.)
I'm surprised we haven't symbolically re-named our capitol city after the groundbreaking AOR rock band Boston!
I'd say we should name some streets after The Cars, but that's just waaaay too self referential.
(Wow, I'm not sure what's in my coffee this morning...)
Name the Filene's Hole after the B-52s
Because it's right near the Orpheum and it looks like the aftermath of a visit from B-52s.
[Snare]
That's mean to the B-52's.
I propose we name that giant, useless, gaping debris-filled hole a Cullen.
(hiyooooo)
Wow that Cullen piece was
Wow that Cullen piece was awful. That's some of the worst "logic" I've seen.
Did anyone, like Kevin
Did anyone, like Kevin Cullen, show any real interest in a temporary rename of U2 before New York did it? Was their a groundswell of support for a renaming that Menino squashed during an election year? I dont recall seeing such a movement, so I dont see how this columnist can show up on the scene and complain about it now.
If we are so big on history and rock bands and want to show up NY then it is time to rename something after Aerosmith which is a major rock band that is still with us with major roots in the area. South East Aerosmith expressway anyone?
They already named the city
They already named the city after a rock band - what does he want?
Which one should go
Here's a question: which one of these columnists should go during the next round of layoffs? Being owned by "The New York Times" there is no reason "The Boston Globe" couldn't double-up and cut head count in the opinion group.
Better yet
Why not outsource columns altogether? There's some kid in Mumbai right now ready to pound out 500 words of deathless prose for a few bucks. Just give him a list of keywords and memes to mine.
nevermind u2
there's the permanently named mark sandman square in cambridge, in honor of the late great morphine frontman. what a weird sentiment from cullen when he could be lobbying for one of our own.
Doh, it just hit me why Cullen wants a street named for U2
The boys are from Ireland! And it's time this under-appreciated and oft-maligned nationality got its fair due here in Boston.
When U2 said "Where the
When U2 said "Where the streets have no name," they were referencing the Boston signage issue, so it's only fair to reciprocate with a gesture.
But if we want to honor the marginalized Irish in Boston, there's the Corrs sisters...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHjS8Oz8Gkg&NR=1
Cullen needs to go. He's
Cullen needs to go. He's Howie-light and if I wanted knee-jerk, poorly written commentary I'd subscribe to the Herald.
Irish rule (South Boston).
Irish rule (South Boston).
U2 Street comes after T Street and before V street. I think Bono and Cullen would appreciate the logic.
U2 on Letterman "Magnificent" Mar 3, 09
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRz4ZTbZP7o
U2 on Letterman "'I'll go crazy if I don't go crazy tonight"Mar4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqSLLMzS8V4
U2 on Letterman "Beautiful Day" Mar 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FIsHBrHRFXk
Cullen Didn't Go Far Enough
I'm still pissed they haven't named a street after the Ultimate Spinach.
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
My head is reeling
There's someone else alive who remembers them?
got, got, got
The also forgot (could it have been the pot?) to name a street after... The Band that Time Forgot, got, got, got.
while we're at it
Let's lobby Newton to name a street after these local boyos.
A contest!
Let's have a contest to rechristen local roadways. How about Human Sexual Response Road? Maybe renaming Longwood Avenue would be appropriate, given all the medical facilities?
Menino should hop on it, it would be a lot more fun than tours of Downtown Crossing.
And my God, are the Globe's columnists awful.
At least Cullen finished off his column...
...with an apropos quote:
What should happen....
is the next time the Globe needs to get reduce staff, they should dump the metro columnists and keep actual reporters.
Columnists are the old bloggers
Now everyone can a columnist.
People want to share their opinions more than they want to hear others'.
I suppose columnists have to go back to their journalistic roots, since they have to produce pieces that are conspicuously a couple steps up from that of random bloggers.
Either that, or they can become incendiary bait for links from bloggers saying "Look what that dodo columnist, John Smith, spewed today..." and "smith my man tellin it like it is boo ya 4 d common man n how furriners n homos r bringin down d country if u donut like it y dont u just leeve neva 4get that is all over n out." A bad newspaper might be a joy forever, but few people want to be bait or, er, baiters.
No, not reporters
But columnists. People who can not just report a story but TELL it and make you care and shake your first or burst out laughing or just go "Hey, Martha, lookit this ..."
Cullen can do that. He just often chooses not to.
Abraham can write a good column, too. If she doesn't hit a home run as often as Cullen, neither does she strike out so horribly as he does.
Walker? Ah, Walker. He really should go back to being a reporter. He seems good at it (look at his recent interview with the Uncooperating Witness). As for his columnizing, bring back Derrick Z - or find somebody else.
I seem to remember a time....
Am I hallucinating, or wasn't there a day not too long ago when a columnist's role was indeed part reporter, sometimes breaking some big, original stories that way? S/he would dig out new news but then use the columnist's editorial license to interpret and comment.
Only the best
I'm already deriving enough spectator sport diversion from newspapers, just from watching them figure out the new media environment. The dramas of columnists and their hits and misses is no longer interesting enough to compete for my attention.
This magical newspaper section for columns, where persuasion is allowed to trump fact and balance, should be reserved for the home run highlights -- messages about which columnists are passionate, and that are well executed -- rather than *bleahs* because someone has to say *something* on a regular schedule.
Columnists might still be opinion influencers, but new media increasingly drives audience towards the best or most compelling speech, wherever it is, on a daily basis. The periodic column is not an ideal fit for that.
pumping it out, on schedule
Yes, the expectation that one should "pump out" a regularly scheduled stream of writing contributes mightily to the problem. We see it in other writing fields as well, such as fiction writing and academe.
Maybe the role of columnist should not be vested in specific individuals whose sole job it is to write a column. Maybe it should be shared among senior reporters.
In addition, the papers should make more room for voices from the blogosphere and new media generally. I'm repeating a point I've made before, but the Globe's op-ed page draws disproportionately from a very narrow slice of Greater Boston, making for a lot of safe and dull commentary that has the residual effect of buttressing the city's culture of insularity.