He, for one, refuses to welcome our new robotic overlords

Former Attorney General Thomas Reilly has to explain to the Supreme Judicial Court next month why he has failed to stop hordes of mini-robots from climbing in trees and through vents, spraying Americans with poisons.

Yes, frickin' really. Mass. Lawyers Weekly reports on the lawsuit by Jay Patrick Mellen, who apparently files legal complaints in lieu of a hobby. Mellen filed pro se, which I believe is Latin for couldn't find a lawyer insane enough to risk his license to file this thing. Mass. Lawyers Weekly posts a copy of his complete lawsuit, which you need to drop everything now and read. Unless you're a mini-robot.

Thankfully, the SJC posts videos of all oral arguments, because the Nov. 2 discussion should be even better than the court's consideration of the case of Lady Godiva.

Posted In

MLW

They need a twitter feed.

JohnAKeith | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 4:14pm

Wow. Just wow.

I have seen some pretty knuckleheaded things in the courts, but this might be the winner.

This really is a great country. Unfortunately, the members of the General Court will not think so, and will think of this case when they appropriate money for the judiciary next year.

issacg | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 5:05pm

Why are they hearing this case?

I can't help but thinking they're going to administer a judicial smackdown and tell him to stop with the nonsense, just like the federal bench in Washington state did with that guy who keeps suing over the conspiracy of 14,000+ people. Only it hasn't stopped him yet.

adamg | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 6:31pm

Orly? (Taiz)

Orly? (Taiz)

anon (not verified) | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 8:31am

My name is Jay Patrick Mellen

I own a mansion and a yacht (and I hate mini robots spraying poisons to inure Americans)

Stevil | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 6:16pm

Duck season!

Also too...

Lawsuits. (Pro se!) Death sprays. It's like a mini-bot. I said it! You heard it! It's like a mini... bot.

Let's make it a dance.

Jay Levitt | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 7:26pm

I find it hard to believe that Reilly has to show up.

Pretty easy way to cause an enemy inconvenience, no? There are probably a whole host of people who could be charged with negligence in failing to prevent said robot invasion- heck, I think Romney actually invented the little buggers! Lemme file a motion- I've always wanted to see the Mittster's hair up close.

Any consequences for Mellen once the case is dismissed on account of absurdity?

Dan Farnkoff | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 6:41pm

Correction

I think Romney actually invented the little buggers

s/invented/is one of/

rsybuchanan | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 6:45pm

You sed

You sed

Michael Pahre | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 9:16pm

That's a real conversation stopper

Sorry, but it's kind of awk-ward.

adamg | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 9:21pm

Shell hear no more of this, your honor

Someone's going to get bash-ed if you keep this uptime.

Chris Devers (not verified) | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 11:48pm

Unix box robots

I kid you not, I worked on a system that used unix to control a robot. An antenna system in this case.

MadMax | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 7:33am

Oh, I believe it

Last thing you want is a robot with a Lisp.

adamg | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 7:41am
merlinmurph | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 7:59am

sh

man, ar these jokes funny.
You guys kill me. Ha ha, tee hee. I can't take any more.

Dave | Thu, 11/12/2009 - 11:59am

Funny?

Or is somebody TCLing you?

adamg | Thu, 11/12/2009 - 12:02pm

Vi for attention

I had to erase what I just wrote here.

I should have read the whole shebang, more or less.

Kaz | Thu, 11/12/2009 - 12:07pm

He doesn't.

He's being represented by Douglas S. Martland, A.A.G. (Assistant Attorney General), as the right-hand column clearly states.

Pretty clear from the page- not sure why Adam didn't get it.

Brett | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 8:17pm

OK, I was overcome

By the thought of the former attorney general being forced to waste valuable time before the SJC on this matter. I'll fix.

adamg | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 8:28pm

but think of the cocktail

but think of the cocktail stories! I mean Reilly is going to be THE MAN to talk to at New Years eve as he explains what the suit is about and what happened in the court room. He is not the most exciting man in the world but damned if I wouldn't stand there and listen to the whole story.

ShadyMilkMan | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 8:59pm

Video of his past oral arguments

Video of his past oral arguments before the SJC. Grab the popcorn!

Traffic ticket (and govt. conspiracies)
http://www.cas.suffolk.edu/sjc/archive/2007/SJC_09...

Random conspiracy theories
http://www.cas.suffolk.edu/sjc/archive/2007/SJC_09...

dirtywater77 | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 8:00pm

Bastard politicians always

Bastard politicians always sending their tree climbing robots after us, I swear one of these days I am voting for the guy who is against this sort of thing.

ShadyMilkMan | Wed, 10/21/2009 - 9:00pm

Tree climbing robots?

So ... that childhood dream tree house in Worcester is really just a training camp or robot HQ???!!!!

No wonder the neighbors hate it.

SwirlyGrrl | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 8:45am

I would venture to say that

I would venture to say that the tree house guy is actually a patriot fighting against the tree climbing robots. When the rest of the state falls to it's knees he will be our last hope.

ShadyMilkMan | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 9:32am

Funny and Sad

Okay, so on the one hand, I couldn't stop laughing at this news story.

But on the other hand, the plaintiff clearly is divorced from reality, and there's something less-than-funny about that.

On the third hand, as an SF writer I couldn't help thinking, what if he's right?

mabfan | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 8:08am

Sometimes the truth does sound insane.

Sometimes Truth is Stranger than Fiction

I don't belive this guy but you have to admit sometimes the truth does sound insane.

http://www.inhabitat.com/2009/08/31/swarms-of-sola...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Northwoods proposed within the United States government in 1962. The plan called for CIA or other operatives to commit apparent acts of terrorism in U.S. cities to create public support for a war against Castro-led Cuba.

http://www.ahrp.org/history/chronology.php History of Human Experiments

Robert (not verified) | Thu, 10/22/2009 - 8:39am

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