People at work who suck

Tom finds himself inside a real-life version of "The Office":

... I hate most of the people here I do work with directly. One them is the lazy insolent guy. He is currently throwing airplanes at other people. He's also the guy that sprayed somebody in the face with an inverted can of compressed air (the kind that reads "DO NOT tilt, shake, or turn can upside down before or during use as liquid contents may be dispersed. Liquid contents may cause frostbite on contact with skin.) ...

Hey Shorty Pants can't stand the person talking to himself in the office:

... No one wants to hear uh-oh, whoops, yikes, that sucks, WTF, etc as you muddle through whatever project\issue you are working on. If the disruptive behavior continues I will be forced to take severe measures to control it. This may or may not involve stabbing someone in the eye with my papermate. ...