And never go in the attic

Brookline Police have issued tips for residents on how to survive until the National Guard or Will Smith can be brought in to take care of "the three most hostile tom turkeys." Among the tips:

Don't Let Turkeys Intimidate You – Don't hesitate to scare or threaten a bold, aggressive turkey with loud noises, swatting with a broom or water sprayed from hose. A dog on a leash is also an effective deterrent. ...

Cover Windows or Other Reflective Objects – If a turkey is pecking at a shiny object such as a vehicle or window, cover or otherwise disguise the object. Harass the bird by chasing it, squirting with a hose or other means of aggression.

Naturally, Angry Brookline Turkey is now pecking out updates on Twitter.

Via Follow Me Here.

Neighborhoods: 

Topics: 

    Free tagging: 

    Comments

    But a dog..

    By on

    OFF a leash would be a solution...

    They are also scared by

    By on

    the "ping" of an aluminum softball bat sending Tom to turkey heaven.

    Get a can of that stuff

    By on

    that makes the loud horn noises. You know, the stuff mouth breathers use at various sporting events. End of problem.

    Air?

    By on

    ?

    Splitter!

    By on

    Splitter!

    Bravery of Universal Hub

    By on

    Turkey - I see that your Twitter acount has been suspended. AG is brave to continue to host such a desperado message.

    BTW - I can offer asylum on 8 acres in Maine (near a haying operation and a corn field).

    Stay strong, Tom!

    Back up

    By on

    Guess Twitter just couldn't bring itself to carry off that fowl deed.

    Free Range

    Don't do it, Tom! She's got cranberries and organic stuffing ... and "free range" doesn't mean what you think it does!

    Hmm.

    By on

    Strange that a leased dog knows how to be an efective "deterrent" while unleashed humans don't seem to have a clue. Define "domesticated" again for me?

    These turkeys clearly need compassion

    By on

    "And understanding that they clearly have issues."

    After the compassion kicks in:

    "Their actions will soon bring the sort of consequences that may lead them to reconsider their behaviors in a positive way."

    So they have that going for them, which is nice.

    "Their actions will soon

    By on

    "Their actions will soon bring the sort of consequences that may lead them to reconsider their behaviors in a positive way."

    I have a feeling that will become a meme here.

    Natural Consequences

    Natural consequences may include being hunted down, killed, and eaten.

    If anybody wants to know how to prepare wild poultry, I'm game. Well, I can help, that is.

    If a turkey is pecking at a

    If a turkey is pecking at a shiny object such as a vehicle or window, cover or otherwise disguise the object.

    Cover or disguise your car or house? Thanks, nimrod.