There's nothing funnier than a sports writer warning a ballplayer to ignore all the mean things he'll see in the papers when he gets to Boston. Especially when it's Dan Shaughnessy.
Mike Mennonno educates the local media on how to pronounce the first name of the Man Who Would Save Fenway:
... It's as if no one at the news station knows any Japanese or Japanese-American people--in a supposedly world-class city like Boston--that they could call up and ask, "am I getting this right?" World class, guys! ...
If the Sox do sign Daisuke Matsuzaka, obviously, we can't call him by his name - try saying it three times fast. Lewis Forman starts a list of possible nicknames for the would-be savior of Fenway:
A picture of Jason Varitek riding a star-spangled unicorn, of course. Basegirl posts it for everybody to gaze upon while recovering from yesterday's Patriots game, as well as from being assaulted by John Madden and John Mellencamp.
... Here's what made Auerbach a legendary figure, though. He didn't do any of those things because he felt sorry for black people, out of some sort of white liberal guilt. He did them because they were the right things to do, at those moments, for the success of the Boston Celtics basketball team. In my book, that makes him far greater than someone trying to address a past inequity or whose main purpose is to fill a quota. ...
... Did all of you forget that he was famous for being a jerk too? He may have been super at what he did, a wonderful coach, a friend, a husband, a father~ I don't know... but I DO know that I am not the only one who has had more than one not-so-nice encounter with the man. ...
... It was a magical moment for players and fans alike, as the Civic Center erupted with an earthquake of cheering. And leave it to my Dad to go over to where Red Auerbach was sitting and hand him a cigar. Red promptly slid off the band and lit up. Right there! ...
Lance launches a rant against "Let's go Bruins!" and the related "Let's go Red Sox!" chants:
... 30 years ago that cheer would have got you beaten in Fenway Park. Had you run a "Lets Go, Bruins" in the Boston Garden in the 70s, Mike Milbury would have come into the stands and beaten you with your shoe.
Members of the 2004 World Series Team who are no longer good baseball players are, it turns out, a lot like Crazy Glue. If you remain in contact too long, they are impossible to get rid of and make you want to pull your skin off. ...
David Scott chronicles "the rapidly-aging and fastly-fading" Bob Lobel's performance on Sunday night's "Sports Final" - was he really giggling over the way that guy collapsed at the finish line of the Chicago Marathon?