Massholes

Paul Levy reports on a near miss. Complete with helpful diagram.

A sting operation! Richard DiBona tweets it's happening right now:

A guy walks back and forth in the crosswalk while a cop waits to bag people who don't stop.

It's a faceoff! CT3 bus driver vs. SUV driver at W. Concord Street and Harrison Avenue in the South End.

Jason Laramie, who took the photo around 9:47 this morning, reports the two have been facing off like that for 10 minutes, blocking traffic (including him) all the way back to Mass. Ave.

Grimlocke reports how she almost got hit by a car in Brookline this morning:

In the crosswalk. I threw my bagel and hit the car. Then I ate the bagel. Everyone who drives in Brookline is an assclown.

Boston Biker recounts a near run-in with a Masshole on Sunday.

IBM has been studying stresses on American motorists, and has released a report claiming stress among Boston drivers is up dramatically this year - enough to push us from the second least stressed out major driving city in 2008 to the fourth most stressed group of drivers in the country (in your face, New York, we're more stressed out than you). Only LA, Washington and Miami drivers experience more agita on the daily commute, based on a survey of 4,440 drivers in ten major US cities, IBM says.

Some 47% of Boston drivers reported being stressed out on their commutes, up 10 percentage points from last year. According to IBM, Boston drivers rated the following as the worst roads for commuting: I-93, Routes 95, 128 and 495, "downtown."

And why is IBM studying drivers that aren't installed on PCs (ba-dum-DUM)? It sells "smart commuting" systems governments can use to try to get traffic to flow better.

Dave Alpert discusses douche lanes - lanes on local roads that are full of douchebag motorists, such as the far right lane at "the end of Storrow Drive - where it forks into Soldier's Field Road and the bridge over to Fresh Pond Parkway." But he wonders: Do the roads turn people into Massholes or are Massholes just naturally attracted to them?

A Green Line commuter forwards this note to the Green Line superintendent and the Executive Office of Transportation:

This morning(8/24) at 7:50 A.M I boarded E Line,Green Line Car 3885B headed inbound at Longwood. The operator did not respond when I said good morning but this is nothing new to be ignored by MBTA workers. Then when the trolley went underground the operator proceeded to tail-gate the trolley in front of it at the Copley, Arlington and Boylston stations. At one point he left only 15 feet or so between the cars. At one of these three station before I got off at park Street he yelled out an expletive about a passenger he though was taking to long to enter the train. He said, "come through the F' ing doors." I am out of work. I would gladly take his place and treat MBTA passengers with respect and not endanger their lives.

Only in Boston.

The Massachusetts Appeals Court today overturned the assault conviction of a gun-toting Commerce Department agent who ended a road-raging duel with a motorcyclist on Boston streets by swerving his government-owned Maxima into him and then making a run to New Hampshire as the man lay on the ground, broken and bleeding. Read more

The Salem News reports a Danvers man was arrested yesterday after he allegedly tried to run down his local garbagemen because they wouldn't take all of his trash under a new town regulation limiting the amount of trash in a single container.

Wicked Local Cambridge reports a guy ended a dispute over a Mass. Ave. parking space last night by shooting the other guy in the ass. The victim is expected to survive; police are now looking for a Masshole with a gun.

Boston Police are apparently getting tired of dealing with angry motorists acting out in traffic delays caused by construction along Dorchester Avenue (including one who is charged with sending a couple of cops to the hospital), so they've issued an advisory that construction will continue today at Dot. Ave. and Freeport. They add:

The work being done is expected to cause and create a certain level of delay and inconvenience.

First, Fox in Detox did NOT hit the woman who was just standing with her bicycle at Washington and Beacon in Brookline, blocking an entire line of cars who had the light. But she has a better understanding now of why somebody might have been tempted.

I know, I know: What?!? The Boston Business Journal reports that some survey found that not only is Boston not in a list of the top ten rudest cities for driving, it's actually ninth on a list of the top ten most courteous cities for driving. Compare to the 2008 survey, which found us second only to Miami in road raginess.

Via Todd Randolph, who demands a recount.

The Dorchester Reporter relates the saga of a woman who, on getting impatient with sitting in traffic at Freeport Street and Dorchester Avenue yesterday morning, took off with two cops still attached to her car - after first kicking a third officer.

Innocent, etc.

Wicked Local Needham reports Needham Police arrested a man for driving while eating a bowl of cereal. With milk. Which police note was still cold. He was pulled over because apparently he only had two hands with which to hold the cereal, his spoon and the steering wheel and he allegedly wasn't doing too well with the latter.

Dry shirt until proven covered in spilled milk.

New federal stats show Massachusetts has lowest seat-belt usage in the country - why, we are even less likely to strap in than two years ago.

Via Channel 4.

While doing 55.

Jessica Lipnack decides she wants a sandwich board to use while walking in crosswalks to tell Massholes to get off their damn phones and pay more attention to the intersection. She says she got the idea after an encounter with a phone-using Masshole in an SUV in a Newtonville crosswalk.

Brookline Police report a Hammond Pond Parkway resident awoke yesterday morning to find "the front bumper [of his car] was missing which contained the fog lights and headlights."

Meanwhile, Jose Anes discusses the art of Masshole parking, in which people see bumpers as an excuse for parking like, well, Massholes:

... A young, white, well dressed lady (as in expensive) just got out of the establishment, entered her brand new Audi. I saw an opportunity to grab this coveted parking spot. Then, without any respect for her parking-mate she backs up into the car parked right behind her and BAM!! She pushed the car behind her just enough to make some space, turn her wheels and get out of there. There was even plenty of space to make an elegant exit had she tried to move back and forth a few times, which can suggest that maybe she did it out of laziness or lack of respect of other’s property. ...

Save My Spot in Southie.

I love this passive-aggressive note (hey, at least the aggrieved person left a note rather than hauling out a tire iron or something).

This is just the sort of thing people in Dorchester complain about.

This special snowflake is today's installment for a couple of reasons. One, it's pretty ballsy to park across a crosswalk on Boylston Street. Two, our Masshole is possibly a cop (the badge was an enamel fraternal-order-of-police badge) and three, this story has a happy ending. Or at least, it would be nice to think so, except that ticket has a good chance of being waived by a local judge...

Last but not least, the fourth reason for this YPLAM installment: Notice something missing from the nose of that Mercedes? Yep, that's right. Our law-abiding citizen and supporter of the Fraternal Order of Police doesn't believe they need to display their front plate.

Mini-van turning onto Beech from Washington in Roslindale this morning, long after the weekend snows had ended.

Dave Atkins runs down the highlights of the new bicycle-safety law just signed by Gov. Patrick. Among them: Opening your car door right in front of a cyclist now carries a $100 fine; motorists must yield to cyclists when making a left turn.