Andrew Oliver, appointed by His Majesty's Government to enforce and collect the stamp tax on all paper products, today announced his resignation from the position on the steps of the Old State House after a rabble of protesters marched his effigy around the town, put it on "trial," found it guilty and ripped it to shreds.
Protesters chanted "Liberty! Property! No stamps!" to the befuddlement of a number of bystanders, who had no clue what they were protesting. One bystander, however, clearly grasped the protest, yelling at the marchers, "Tax the French in Quebec!"
As they passed the Millennium Tower construction project, one worker up on the third floor cheered them on by liberal use of an air horn.
At the Old State House, leaders of the protest read charges against Oliver. Finding none willing to defend him, they declared the effigy guilty and tore it apart, throwing bits of it into the crowd.
And then, slowly, Oliver appeared on the steps of the Old State House. After the booing quieted down, he read a statement in which he said he had never collected any of the tax and that he never would, since he was resigning, effective immediately.
After some hearty huzzahs, an official from the Bostonian Society thanked participants for observing the 250th anniversary of the Stamp Act protests in Boston, which helped set in motion the events that led to the Revolution.
The crowd then dispersed, no doubt to the nearest tavern.