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The frustration of being a robot named Marty

Marty stood in Aisle 3, seething, his eyes flashing yellow in impotent rage, for he had no arms and could only grimly warn passersby of the danger that lay in front of him, a dropped package of fruit rollups.

This was in the Dedham Stop & Shop tonight. Marty just glumly kept muttering "Danger!" and "Peligro!" as a robo-lady on the PA kept declaring "Cleanup in Aisle 3!" until, finally, somebody went there and ordered Marty into his corner at the front of the store so he could recharge and reconsider his existence or something (and, presumably, then bent down and picked up the fruit rollups).

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Comments

This robot is dumb. Literally does nothing but a publicity stunt

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If it makes you feel any better, it's also likely collecting facial recognition data.

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watch out for the fruits and vegetables.

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I've seen him at Stop & Shop in Watertown, also. I bet he doesn't even get minimum wage! Poor bastard. When will we stop mistreating our robot friends?

Suldog

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Or was it specifically limited to Boston Calling?

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Marty should be hired by the MBTA to alert passengers to fires, delays, teenage troublemakers and passed out homeless passengers. He probably won't be able to ride trains or buses but neither do the Transit police.

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I swear that thing was following me around in an otherwise quiet Stop and Shop.
It was always in the way.
He's gonna get them sued for profiling, and I'm white.

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And all I can do is summon non-existent employees to pick up fruit roll ups.

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I don't think they have an Aisle 42...

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on the ruins of the legendary planet of Magrethea.

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Marty just guards the place until the local life forms can develop a civilization capable of restocking the lemon scented towelettes in about 10000 years.

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I like to play games with Marty when he hangs in the Neponset Stop & Shop. I drive my shopping cart quickly right up to him and force him to stop. He is afraid of fast moving shopping carts.
Also, in some cases I have seen, Marty does not recognize the difference between a real cleanup needed and a merchandising display on the floor. It is clear that the employees universally hate Marty and usually just ignore him. Just because Marty is demanding a cleanup doesn't mean the employees care any more or less than they normally would. The result is that damn clean up message on the PA system just repeats and repeats and repeats.

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"Klaatu barada nikto"

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In this case I believe it's Marty, barada nikto...

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I mumble the DUM-DUM-DE-DUM-DUM music from The Terminator.

(And yes, I know he's a robot and not a cyborg...)

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Marty might be good on the Zoning Board of Appeals. Smarter and more articulate than most of the board. They could add a greased palm or a money drop slot so he feels included. Plus, he can't testify or can he?

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Ayanna Pressley in Congress

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When not patrolling the aisles of a grocery store, Marty has been moonlighting as President Trump's attache to Ukraine. Except he's recorded everything, and will be calling for Congress to cleanup on aisle 1 shortly.

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video?

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Is it OK to punch a robot? Asking for a friend.

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"Does the robot have any lasers?"

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No, no. That would be too obvious.

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Send Marty all over to Causeway and Portland to clean the sidewalks.

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he doesn't clean anything, he just finds things on the floor and makes announcements

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to name an armless robot after the mayor.

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Even a robot deserves better.

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I like to zap my self checkout laser in Marty's electronic eyes and pretend it's a deadly blaster ray.

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