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Developer tries to rename part of Dorchester as 'Seaport South'

"Morrissey Boulevard" apparently isn't upscale sounding enough for Beacon Capital Partners, the developer behind that new life-sciences complex where the Globe used to be, so they've decided it's now located in "Seaport South:"

Vibrant neighborhood

Surrounded by destinations like the Washington Village and the Boston Flower Exchange, as well as hip, new restaurants, and developments, the Seaport South neighborhood is quickly emerging as the place to be in Boston.

Oh, come on. Everybody knows it's the North Chest, right on the border of SoBo. Also, as Matt Frank notes in the comments below, it's nowhere near the Boston Flower Exchange, because the exchange shut its Albany Street location and moved to Chelsea and then renamed itself the New England Flower Exchange in 2017.

Via Janelle Nanos, who sighs: "Lord help me."

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Comments

Was “Le Flooded Paahking Lot” taken?

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Sttaaaaaahppppp it

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If it's off Morrissey Blvd, it should be called "Jesus, we're too close to John Costello"

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LOL

*audible cackle*

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#1 Post of the Day!

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I was lamenting not having reactions for a heart emoji for the actual story, but, yeah, your comment would have to steal it.

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Good one.

I’m going to Venmo you 8 cents because I’m taking up too much space rent free in that 10 cent head of yours.

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Dorchester will be just as fucked up as the Seaport, except you can't walk to South Station.

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Years ago some realtors wanted to call the part of JP that is south of the monument SoMo. I see so many wonderful new names: HoMo (I would send personal invitations to certain "Christian" relatives to visit me there). Provincetown could be ProTo. West Hollywood is already WeHo. Where would HoHo be? Next to that really cold place where the white bearded guy lives in NoPo? Oh the places we will go, oh ho oh.

On another not so serious note (would that be Onnosono?), realtor speak frightens me. Douglass Adams already predicted an end of the world scenario where chefs are celebrities and telephone sanitizers are laid off (which is kind of weird in its prediction in light of Covid). But when realtor speak becomes part of everyday language then we know the end is nigh. It's right there in The Book of Revelation, aka, the Apocalypse of John, aka, John (some have offered Joan) of Patmos. So we could call this book ApoJo or JoMo, none of which is to be confused with that excellent breakfast cereal, AppleJacks, aka ApJac.

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...to make the Texan students feel at home.

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Sorry dude, but Mother Nature's got plans for Morrissey Boulevard.

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there's nothing there.

and to say it's accessible by foot is a joke, unless the only place you're going to or coming from is Columbia Point. Each of the only two access points under 93 - and to anything resembling the neighborhood they seem to be promising - are at least a half mile away.

Calling it the Morrissey Waterfront - MoWa - would have been much more accurate.

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was a stretch being called Sesport, but when you have outsiders with no clue where they are or where they bought you have nobody to blame but yourself.

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Where else would bros live?

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What about Bayside West?

Or is "Bayside" copyrighted or trademarked or something?

Maybe...

Columbia Point

Columbia Pith

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Roller Derby coming here??!! How did I miss this news?

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The new home of the 1970s one-hit-wonder super group, the Dorchester Bay City Rollers.

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Call it the Sea Level Rise District.

Or SLR for short. Enjoy daily contact with the ebb and flow of the tides as the rising seas greet you twice daily.

Only the hucksters selling this zone as anything but a future marina will be high and dry.

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except for the part where apparently this kind of nonsense actually works.

Recently I saw that "LUXURY CONDOMINIUMS" has been so overused that it's now meaningless, and your sign has to claim they're "ULTRA LUXURY CONDOMINIUMS."

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This seat cushion I brought from home is perfect for the all new Orange Line seat as I chug my way to my job at an all new life science job. Ugh.

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"Seaport South" is an absolutely terrible moniker when you have "Stab 'n Kill North" right at your fingertips.

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No.

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I recall a dozen or more years ago when a developer started referring to a project in Roxbury’s Fort Hill as being in Mission Hill South. The neighborhood wasn’t having it. Given everything, it was a dubious distinction anyway.

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You'll spot the hip new residents of the "Drowning Zone" by the hip waders they will wear during high tide.

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Does Roslindale work as RoBo?

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Then you can be a RoBo cop. ;-)

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Hey, how about ExSToR: Extremely Southeastern Tory Row.

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Remember when the residents of Milton wanted to change the name of Blue Hill Ave when you entered Milton because those people lived on Blue Hill Ave. Beacon Capitol wants to change the name to Seaport South because those people live in Dorchester.

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How about SoCoPo: South of Columbia Point?

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The Lofts at SodoSepo, close to the city part of town.

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Ages ago, before "Seaport District" was even a twinkle in developers' eyes, there was a move by businesses to label the Fort Port Channel area "New Boston". Sigh ...

I can't claim to be a DotRat — I've only lived here for 40 years — but it pains me that developers and real estate agents seem to think that Dorchester is such an undesirable place to live that they have to invent new names for it.

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Something to lighten your mood.

IMAGE(https://scontent-bos5-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t39.30808-6/343115338_573452168209039_2372005659133583901_n.jpg?stp=cp6_dst-jpg&_nc_cat=107&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=5cd70e&_nc_ohc=0yOkMR1l5L4AX_nNxJT&_nc_ht=scontent-bos5-1.xx&oh=00_AfCoHqHySwEnJ2rKwXQp8Pcr1OxfSnLLwB5l-VKIsxS6tA&oe=6453FBAD)

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The seaport is a generic McNeighborhood you can find in any wealthy city, full of chain restaurants and stores with lots of parking garages and wide pedestrian unfriendly streets. Why would any developer want to associate their project with this terrible mistake Boston made? It feels like a fake neighborhood in Arizona Texas or California. Massive subsidies went to build this area that is an embarrassment that even our own mayor said was a disappointment.

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I know it's not the point of the story... But didn't the Boston Flower Exchange move to Chelsea and is now known as the New England Flower Exchange??? Like back in 2016/2017?

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Sounds better than the South Bay Incinerator, which isn't there anymore, either.

But, yeah, you're right, the flower exchange moved to Chelsea to make way for some huge life-sciences complex, the location of which at least makes sense given the proximity to Boston Medical Center, BU Medical School and the Home o' the World's Deadliest Microbes at the National Emerging Infectious Diseases Laboratories.

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Southline Boston is on the non-floody side of Morrisey Boulevard. Not counting epic torrential downpours I mean.

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