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Dead turkeys

A couple days ago, Megan M of Brighton asked:

What’s the right move when a turkey takes up residence inside your garage? Who can help?!

But now she has an updated query:

Now what happens when the turkey has died in your backyard ... ?! (PS I rent I dont own the property)

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Comments

Dinner.

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Perhaps that's the title of the next film project from Lars Von Trier. This, with the deceased, is a very suspicious occurrence. First, the unwanted turkey is apparently at odds with some humans over a material object, a garage. Then, said turkey winds up dead in the backyard, and said "humans" can't think of a fair way to dispose of it. When the alien turkey big reveal comes, "humans" like these not be spared. May Tom have mercy on your souls.

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How great is the landlord where you're querying us instead of them about a (expletive) dead turkey?

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that would be the logical thing to do and call animal control

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property. You need to get rid of it yourself (or landlord has to), call an exterminator or get it out to the sidewalk.

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I hear he can make problems like this go away

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And a trash can. PS don’t wait, the flies and maggots will only increase.

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- Kirk Van Houten, "A Milhouse Divided"
https://youtu.be/q6xnq-9SRDo?t=96

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Normally with dead animals in the city, a quick 311 will do the trick. However, if it is on private property, the city won't come and take it. It's the responsibility of the landlord to dispose of it. But! If the landlord won't, dinner is always an option.

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Ein sat hon úti
aftan dags,
nam hon svá margt
um at mælask:
"Hafa skal ek Sigurð,
- eða þó svelta, -
mög frumungan
mér á armi.

Orð mæltak nú,
iðrumk eftir þess:
kván er hans Guðrún,
en ek Gunnars;
ljótar nornir
skópu oss langa þrá.

Vildu okkr fylki
til fjár véla?
Gótt er at ráða
Rínar malmi
ok unandi
auði stýra
ok sitjandi
sælu njóta.

Réð til hefnda
hergjarn í sal
ok eftir varp
óbilgjörnum;
fló til Guthorms
Grams ramliga
kynbirt járn
ór konungs hendi.
Þó mun á beinum
brenna yðrum
færi eyrir,

þá er ér fram komið,
neitt Menju góð,
mín at vitja.
Hló þá Brynhildr
Buðla dóttir
einu sinni
af öllum hug,
er hon til hvílu
heyra knátti
gjallan grát
Gjúka dóttur

Sofnuð var Guðrún
í sæingu
sorgalaus
hjá Sigurði,
en hon vaknaði
vilja firrð,
er hon Freys vinar
flaut í dreyra

Hné hans of dolgr
til hluta tveggja,
hendr ok höfuð
hné á annan veg,
en fóta hlutr
féll aftr í stað

Þar er mær borin,
- móðir fæðir, -
sú mun hvítari
en inn heiði dagr
Svanhildr vera,
sólar geisla.

Því at hánum fylgja
fimm ambáttir,
átta þjónar,
eðlum góðir,
fóstrman mitt
ok faðerni,
þat er Buðli gaf
barni sínu

Margt sagða ek,
munda ek fleira,
er mér meir mjötuðr
málrúm gæfi;
ómum þverr,
undir svella,
satt eitt sagðak,
svá mun ek láta.

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Does your recipe reflect cooking time for a chilled bird? How to compensate for three days in 80+ heat?

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Angus Dei, qui tollis pecata mundi.

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since it's not a lamb...

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It's not every Mass that we sing about Turcias... :)

Thx for the correction!

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In my neighborhood, they'd probably be on the job already - and louder and wilder about it than a hair metal tribute band playing a class reunion.

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Get a shovel and a large trash bag. Proceed to deposit one dead bird into the bag. Throw the bag out on trash day! It's not rocket science.

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