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Ass and ye shall receive at the Natick Mall

Oh, come on, you didn't think I was going to break down and use that new name, did you? In any case: naked butt at the mall tomorrow, according to the MetroWest Daily News, which thoughtfully brackets its press release for the store in question with this sobering warning:

Under the state's open and gross lewdness law, the exposure of the buttocks can be a felony. Much hinges on whether the bottom-baring produces alarm, according to Natick Police Lt. Brian Grassey.

So I guess booty shaking is straight out, because you know how alarming that can be. Still, Lt. Grassey might wish to bone up on Commonwealth vs. Ora, in which the Supreme Judicial Court ruled earlier this year that you can dance naked in the middle of even Harvard Square at noon - as long as you provide adequate advance warning to the easily alarmed.

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Comments

There's a joke in there about accidentally dropping unwrapped soap/shampoo bars, bending over, and being naked...

I know it's there, but I'm just a bit too distracted to remember it.

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This is a Collection of Crap. Those Butthead cops should just turn the other Cheek and let the employees be. If they want to stand at the Rear of the store and simply Crack a smile at this action, that's fine, but if they want to be Assholes, that's not cool.

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I wonder what happens if an employee is unwilling to go bare-tushied. Is s/he, uh, canned?

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I can't imagine that HR won't have their asses covered.

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Heres another link.

I have a few thoughts on this. It seems that this is a company sponsored event where employees are not wearing clothing (except for aprons), doesnt that almost make Lush in Natick a strip club for the day? Im also wondering about the health concerns, with the majority of these items being unpackaged , what will the board of health think about the possible exposure of these items to underclad people? My third thought is I notice that the pic in my link has a guy in it, if there are guys who are working I wonder how they will handle that little something extra that guys have. Obviously it will be covered from the front, but it will still be hanging down and visible from the back in certain situations.

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Perhaps the aprons are sturdy, although they can't prevent all embareassment. I hope they don't have problems with hairassment, because the aprons won't do anything for that either.

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You know ... the abutters? Will they get more foot traffic? Or will they end the day in arrears?

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If offended, other busineses can always offer entry to their stores through their rear entrance.

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Are they implying that the male employees might have excessive packaging problems of their own?

Are female employees being discouraged from wearing bras as well?

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Because you know how well endowed Harvard is.

Hey, try the veal.

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I'm at the Natick Mall, and apparently I missed all the fun. Nothing but fully clothed clerks, and a corporate- looking woman lecturing a younger employee.

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a corporate- looking woman lecturing a younger employee

Sternly, I hope. With some wags of her finger as she whips off her glasses with one hands and rubs her face in disbelief at what those imps tried to pull off, disgracing the good name of the chain.

Or something.

Right?

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And not all that stern- kind of nervous and sad.

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Got an address?

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adamg @ gaffin.com <-- yes, stupid, pointless anti-spam technique.

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According to other sources this was supposed to happen at 25 stores nationwide.

I wonder if any of them actually happened.

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WHDH reported that Lush employees at Providence Place actually went bare apron.

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Prithee cast out those demons of nudity and frivolous frolick that dance amidst Roger Williams' perfidy!

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The two young men featured in the Herald are already media savy, they both have locked facebook accounts lol

They must have known people would look at their profiles if they were open.

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Consider Natick, because it was able to spare two police officers yesterday to make sure nobody got out of hand during the store's publicity stunt. So instead, two male employees put on black briefs to go with their black aprons. And thus is Natick's populace put back at ease, knowing that any lechers in search of wild debauchery will have to continue to prowl the parking lanes of Shoppers World in Framingham.

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