Howie Carr Lite
By adamg - Thu, 08/14/2008 - 9:34am.
Is Kevin Cullen now auditioning for a job at the Herald?
Never have the good people of Richmond met more guys wearing Sansabelt pants and reeking of halitosis that could melt the glaciers. Folks at roadside farm stands report of men roughly the size of manatees emerging from cars with low-number license plates to ask in barely discernible accents the same question: "Where's the closest packie?"
After getting directions, our honorable representatives, without exception, asked a follow-up: "How late they open?"
Points for gratuitous cheap shots; demerits for just making stuff up.
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Good word choice for a Carr knockoff
Carr is the only person I've ever seen use the word "solon" until Cullen used it today. Maybe his next column can be about the BFD contract negotiations and he can work in some references to "jakes".
Bonus points
If he works in a reference to the Corrupt Midget (no doubt by referencing some pension-reform hearing he attended back in 1988).
Double Letter Score for
Double Letter Score for using 'halitosis'.
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Not really a copycat till he
Not really a copycat till he combines the word "hall" with halitosis. But he is borderline.
Points off for neglecting to mention that
Middleborough voted to approve a casino deal, casting doubt on the implicit assertion that no towns actually want casinos. But in terms of the halitosis, how do we know he made it up?
Some would question the Middleborough vote
See here.
Yes, I suppose Kevin Cullen actually stood at a farm stand in the middle of nowhere and witnessed scores of fat, drunken Boston politicians in need of a toothbrush staggering around looking for a packie.
And I suppose tomorrow the sun might rise in the west. But I'm kind of doubting it.
I thought we were supposed to assume that he was paraphrasing
his friend, "The Man," who was a nosewitness to the unpleasantness in question.