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Why I Have Decided to Leave UniversalHub (for awhile, anyway):
By anon on Fri, 01/25/2008 - 10:34pm
Hello out there, folks.
Just to let you all know that, after afew weeks of thinking this through, I've made my final decidion. I've decided to leave UniversalHub for the following reasons:
A) It's very clear, that, due to my different style of posting, interacting, conversing, communicating, writing and socializing, and a different way of looking things generally, that I do not fit in here.
B) There are plenty of things that I would've liked to engage in discourse about besides everything Boston, and it's clear that there's no room for that here.
C) It's also clear that I will not be missed here on Universal Hub, and I have not contributed to this blog in a way that was to people's liking here. Hey...I gave it the old college try, so to speak, but it hasn't worked out for me on the long run. On that note, I will leave you all to have a grand old time without me..and have at it.
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Comments
another swirrley grrl victim!
I am w/ you independentminded. Adam I love what you created, but it sometimes feels like the popular (and angry) table in highschool.
I have cut back and for me, its just not welcoming w/ the posters- hence my anonymity.
Anonymity is fine
So how do we encourage civil discourse here?
As for the OP, well, this is the second online community I've started that she's quit in a huff after engaging in verbal fisticuffs with other posters.
huh?
Explain yourself, brave drive-by!
Is this necessary?
Hi independentminded,
I only started using this blog a couple weeks ago. Being new here, I am a little in the dark. But what is this "old college try" you speak of? Are you a contributor or editor of Universal Hub?
I guess I am confused - what efforts and contributions have you made to the blog, that will now be stopping? I just saw one long, confusing post about how you felt oppressed for your enjoyment of musicals, which you have to admit lead to some quite funny comments set in the style of famous musical numbers.
I always think it's sad when people post these sorts of "Screw it, I quit" messages to blogs. It's just a blog! As far as I'm concerned, your always welcome here. Of course, I'm new here, so who gives a shit about my opinion ;)
Long-term fretting
You can check on a commenter's blog posts and comments through clicking on their handle. You can see that independentminded left sometime ago, emotionally at least. There are some fairly flaming posts.
Ironically for the tone of the I-quit post, im's others got into the ether, sometimes ignored and sometimes getting disagreement.
Meh.
Welcome to UH!
Thanks for your comments of late, too!
As a newcomer, can I ask what drives you nuts about the site? Anything I should be trying to fix or improve?
Thanks!
Good grief
Save the drama for your mama! Please. Life will go on folks. And what the hell else would we engage in discourse about on Universal Hub besides everything Boston? Helllllo?
who cares? It's just the
who cares?
It's just the tubes
What do you want from life?
What do you want from life?
A whole herd of Winnebagos.
A whole herd of Winnebagos.
Well, you can't have that, BUT
As an American Citizen you are entitled to ... a kidney shaped pool ... and a baby's arm holding an apple.
Life? Don't talk to me about
Life? Don't talk to me about life!
And who is Randy Mantooth, anyway?
Ask TS the Urban Paramedic
Randolph Mantooth played one of the paramedic guys in "Emergency". I know that because I watched it religiously as an 8 year old.
why must people quit in a
why must people quit in a huff in such a loud manner? I don't understand these drama queens (and in this case, that could be men or women) who make a huge deal of withdrawing from a certain forum or activity or whatever. Didn't it ever occur to people to consider the situation and withdraw quietly?
I like UH, and not just because I've known Adam for years (& years!). It's not a perfect forum for discourse, but then again, what is? It keeps me abreast of other blogs in Boston, which (I think) is the purpose of the site. If I want to comment on something on UH then I will, but if someone else flames me for it, that's the price I pay for posting.
Maybe that's the USENET'er in me.
It's the attention
People quit in a huff - and publicize it - when they want some attention. It's like, 'I'm leaving now. No, really, see? I'm walking toward the door. Seriously, I'm leaving NOW, are you watching? I said I'm leaving.' I suspect when people do that they really want you to go, 'Oh no! Don't leave! We'll be devastated!'
It's kind of cute when little kids do that routine - the whole 'I'm running away! See! Going now! Bye!' and then they take their back pack into the backyard and eat PB&Js whilst sulking. On an adult? Not cute in the least.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jen Stewart
In case anyone's wondering...
cut-and-pasted from another forum, dateline September 2006:
Well--I thought I'd give [other forum] a second try, which was probably a mistake on my part. This forum has really become a haven for bigots, hypocrits, baiters, right-wing reactionaries and super-petty people who knitpick and tell other posters what they should or should not post here, and who do nothing but mudsling at each other and flame with impunity. There's not been any intelligent discussions on this forum for months, and threads regularly disintegrate into flamewars and/or are hijacked way off topic. Thsi is clearly no accident, but by design. Truth be told, I am really, really disgusted and tired of the pettiness and the constant hounding back and forth that goes on here. Part of the blame has to rest with Adam [our new ant overlord], the owner/proprietor of the [other forum]. By not setting FIRM rules against flaming and abuse, and this sort of pettiness, he has affectively allowed this whole forum to just go to shit. Well, folks--you can HAVE this forum--goodbye--I'm out of here. No need to reply to this post. (yawn)
*****
the beauty was how it brougth people on that forum who usualy hate each othre together in agrrement.
lol
Are you kidding? This woman is a serial blog-quitter?
*sigh*
How many more times must it be explained? "Different" posting styles are fine. "Abusive" posts and comments are not.
"I disagree with you, and here's why" is fine.
"FUCK YOU SWEETIE" is not.
Dude, my social skills suck, and I can tell the difference here.
To be fair
or at least as fair as I think I can be, her insulting remarks typically came after she had posted several inane and/or repetitive comments which would then be mocked or insulted by others. Yes, she always had to say something about *everything*, even when she had nothing to add to the discussion, but the rest of us always had the choice to ignore it. When we didn't, and she received negative or nasty comments in response, she apparently became hurt and angry, lashing out at others regardless of whether they were the attackers.
Maybe we can all try to be a little kinder to one another, and try to assume that everyone means well with their comments -- even the sarcastic ones -- rather than jumping to the conclusion that others are attacking us and responding in kind. I think most of us "play nice" most of the time, but I suppose we can all use a reminder from time to time.
Ayup
I suppose the technological fix would be software that lets you not see posts by somebody you just can't stand anymore. I actually tried installing such a beast, but something went wrong - it only worked for people who were logged in; in fact, it basically disabled the entire site for everybody else. One of these days I'll see if I can figure out why.
My goodness, I don't think
My goodness, I don't think I've ever seen a flounce this dramatic outside of fandom.
Goodbye cruel internets...I TRUST YOU'LL MISS ME. (I'll probably be back in two weeks anyway.)
Happy Trails
Here's to your new personal blog, where you can say what you want when you want about whatever you want at any time!
Add cliche comment from movie, here ...
Ha.
Just try to stay away from Universal Hub, Ms. IndyMind, just try ...
They'll pull you back, every time.
Trust, me on this one ... you'll be back.
YOU Leaving
How can we miss you when you won't go away?
Don't tell me your leaving, just go. No need for Drama.
Huh?
Who were you?
I'm stayin'!
I'd just like to announce to everyone that I'm staying, because I'm sure you all care what I do.
seosmh
Another Attention Seeking baby!
What are you, 12 years old? Oh look at me, my opinion matters.
I only read UH to seen the insane nonsense people, in their mildly interesting lives, try to put out as being important. 90% of the world's blogs could disappear overnight and no one would miss them.
Boo hoo, go get a day job so you're not running up my taxes living on welfare.
That goes for any one else who thinks they are self important or some kind of journalist. Being a douche with a computer and a blog doesn't make you a reporter - it means you have too much time on your hands.
I bet if, instead of people posting online, they actually tried to make a difference with ACTION like...cleaning up the streets, volunteering at community service, donating a few bucks here and there, we'd be in a lot better shape as a city and as a community than some whiney bloggers typing how the like at DD really upset you or how someone got stabbed in Roslindale (uh, did anyone not know that place is a hole? hello?)
Go back to sorting books at Borders!
What are you, 15?
What's with the black-or-white mentality? Somebody blogs, so therefore they can't help out their neighbors? Somebody complains about Dunkin' Donuts so therefore they can't possibly be a productive member of society? Come back when you grow up, you trolly little kid, and yeah, stay out of Roslindale, because it's full of scary monsters that eat kiddies like you for lunch and then spit out the bones. In fact, I'm pretty hungry right now; a pity I have to go over to the packy in my Cadillac and buy some booze with my food stamps, or I'd be out lookin' for ya.
What he said. Also, brave
What he said.
Also, brave Anon, why aren't you out doing all those things you're lauding yourself instead of sitting around commenting on the computer about what a waste of time sitting around commenting on the computer is.
I mean, maybe it took you most of the day to put that post together, but most of us can write something of similar length and coherence in about five minutes, leaving the rest of the day to go improve society.
Yes, we can go on and on
Yes, we can go on and on pretending that parts of the city are great because they have a Brazilian BBQ and a cool hat shop? Come on, lets be real - not every minority populated section of town is dangerous, but people act like they are surprised that cramming improvished people into sections of the city won't erupt in violence?
Lets take a step back and look at the Ashmont area. It was labelled 'up and coming' because a few clusters of gays bought and restored victorian houses, the Ashmont Grille opened, and someone installed a new brick sidewalk. That's like saying Starbucks and the Gap made Central Square hot and happening.
Yes, I am sure Rozzie has kewl places - like that park to Alexander the great, or that one Peruvian place. Crime and trash != culture.
I don't believe we should whitewash the city, I believe in social change. The 'digerati' believe that by whining about the line at Dunkin Donuts, the T Radio, and the like, they will affect social change. It does not come from the 'customer service' style of complain and comply, it comes from real ideas.
I fear Boston is becoming a city of whiners; and that makes certain groups of people care less because we just want everyone to shut up, and we'll go on with our lives.
Keep in mind that opinions in mirror may be closer than they appear.
Where's the Peruvian place in Rozzie?
Now that would be cool, so don't keep it to yourself, friend. I could do with some good Peruvian food right about now.
Maybe thinking of the place
Maybe thinking of the place on the corner of Washington and Grove sts in West Roxbury.
That's Venezuelan
Run by a Haitian guy.
No,
Got to be thinking about the place down by Roche Bros. in West Rox. Masona Grill, Corey St.
Oh, right!
That's right, the owner is Peruvian, although it's not a Peruvian restaurant per se. Also not anywhere near Rozzie, but I think the original poster's already made it clear he's not real familiar with that neighborhood.
Loser
Roslindale is a hole? Crime and trash does not equal culture?
Why don't you crawl back to your gated suburb and hide under your Martha Stewart quilt?
Better lock your car doors when you drive through Roslindale. The brown people might bite you!
RACIAL SHENANIGANS
Better lock your car doors when you drive through Roslindale. The brown people might bite you!
Alright, that's it. I call RACIAL SHENANIGANS on Gareth! ;)
How many times can a guy make distinctly distasteful racial comments as a means to tar someone else as a racist, simply because they had a different opinion on an unrelated matter?
Now I don't know if this is an example of
But it cannot be healthy to ascribe a paranoia towards "brown people" when someone challenges the cultural vitality of Roslindale.
For this calling of RACIAL SHENANIGANS to stick, it must be seconded by someone else.
Does anyone second the motion?
If not, the call of shenanigans will lapse after 2 days.
;)
Read the post I responded to
I'm not just making this up.
I'm usually not the first one to call racism here, but I don't think I'm imagining this.
Hey, there's different kinds of people out there. I know that one reason my family lives in Roslindale is that it is ethnically mixed. I would not want to live in one of the white neighborhoods of Boston.
Some people see ethnic diversity and immediately think poverty and violence. I see it and think nobody's going to make nasty comments to my wife or my brother walking around town. YMMV.
Why call racism at all?
Perhaps you are right, but here's another perspective.
There are parts of Boston that are "Ghetto". I contend that this is something we should feel reasonably comfortable discussing and thinking clearly about.
Now if we suspend our knee-jerk accusations of racism for just one moment, what does this concept mean to us?
I think most people would agree it's an overlap of a few characteristics:
1. dense, low rent, 'slum'-type housing
2. high crime rate, especially violent crime
3. lack of attractive retail, commercial, and entertainment businesses
4. dense population that displays some of these characteristics:
- many low-income / public assistance
- low rate of nuclear family cohesion
- prevalence of teenage gang and crime activity and attendant random violence (as opposed to traditional adult crime, such as professional robbers)
Now, a lot of people would throw another bullet into (4), and say that the populations are largely non-white. I think that's what the original poster was referring to in his sentence.
Read it again, and see if you can see it without the racism:
The person, to me, seems to be instinctively DISTANCING him or herself from the racial characteristic, as a way of making some "social space" in which he can feel comfortable articulating the "Ghetto"-ness of the area based on the "cramming impoverished people".
So I read the comment as a person making an effort to say "I am not racist. This area is ghetto and prone to violence".
Do you REALLY read it differently, or looking back, do you see my point?
Problem is
Roslindale isn't ghetto.
Is that something so hard to imagine, that when you look out the car window and see brown people, it doesn't mean you're in a ghetto?
I mean, look at your criteria and consider Roslindale:
1. dense, low rent, 'slum'-type housing
NOPE. Come on over to my street. Not even a triple-decker. Most of Roslindale is zoned single/double.
2. high crime rate, especially violent crime
NOPE. Roslindale is doing just fine for crime rate, thanks. The people who started this were from Dot.
3. lack of attractive retail, commercial, and entertainment businesses
NOPE. You really think Sofia's Grotto is unattractive? How about Delfino's? Goeffrey's? Pazzo Books? Fornax? Do you even know any business in Rozzie?
4. dense population that displays some of these characteristics:
- many low-income / public assistance
- low rate of nuclear family cohesion
- prevalence of teenage gang and crime activity and attendant random violence (as opposed to traditional adult crime, such as professional robbers)
And that one is just what they call 'dog whistle politics.' Family Values? Low Income? Because my mom was low income and divorced are you gonna call me ghetto now? Now, really, Marc, you're just making this shit up. "Prevalence of teenage gange and crime activity?" Is that really what you think Roslindale is like? And that's based on what, exactly?
Hey, if you really think it's like that, then I'd as soon you stay away. Yup, it's awful here. Awfully lacking in crackers.
Well, come ON now
Look my friend, I don't personally espouse the view that Roslindale is ghetto. I do espouse the view that you are being knee-jerk when someone else brings up the ghetto-ness factor of ANY area, since it is a REAL thing that should be open for discussion. Especially when people appear to be intentionally avoiding the confluence of the ghetto thing with the racial thing. Is that so offensive to you?
As I said before, I personally take offense at your repeated "fear of brown people" lines and I can't get a sense of why you whip that out every five minutes.
But look, if this is just "who you are", and you want to be all like that, then fine. Gareth, go ahead and ban me from visiting Roslindale on my way from Dedham through West Roxbury to JP. Get all up on your ridiculous high horse, see if anyone cares.
But I think this level of racial hostility, coming FROM YOU, should give you pause for introspection. Is Roslindale so perfect that any possible questioning or criticism brings down your full anti-racism wrath? Or could you maybe hold back a second, lose the "fear of brown people" rhetoric, and maybe not get all racially out of whack because someone dares to impugn the quality of garbage pick-up in your neighborhood?
All in good fun...
It seems to me that whenever
It seems to me that whenever someone has used the phrase "brown people" in a discussion, they've basically Godwinned the thread and it's time to quit; no sense arguing with a brick wall.
PS: Chappaquiddick
P.P.S.
P.P.S. Hitler.
Your turn to introspect
Introspection? Okay... I'll introspect about why it makes me feel offended when somebody says that "Roslindale is a hole" and "Crime and trash =/= culture," and connects that with it being "minority populated." Okay, done. It's because that's racist bullshit.
Now how about you introspect a little bit. How about you introspect on the matter of when there actually is racism being expressed here, you get up on your high horse and say that the person pointing it out must either be a closet racist himself or a self-hating black man? Why do you feel the need to slam down so hard on someone who questions the privilege of anonymous to make racist insults here?
So why is that? Would you like to introspect a little on where that came from in you? I know what you'd rather be doing is dancing about, talking about how there's obviously something wrong with me because I dare to point this out (I daresay, that just isn't done, good chap) instead of thinking about just why it is that you felt the need to follow up that blanket accusation with a four-point argument for Roslindale's ghetto-hood.
And let's talk a little bit about "racial hostility," because it seems to me you're a little bit confused about what that means. Racial hostility is when someone is hostile to you because of how you look, like when they say "What are you doing in this neighborhood," or they say "No, really, where are you from," or they make catcalls at you or something. Racial privilege, on the other hand, is where someone thinks it his god-given right to act that way. Now, that's something we don't have much of in my neighborhood. And I like it that way, because it's more comfortable for my family.
See, I'm not expressing "racial hostility" towards you because I don't know what you look like, nor do I care. You could be glow-in the dark white or you could be Haitian. I don't care. All I care about is that you seem to be defending, with your words, anonymous' racial privilege to bust in here and start saying racist bullshit about Roslindale.
So you can act all attacked and faint on the couch like Scarlett O'Hara if you want to. But I think it's clear to most people that you're coyly avoiding the real issue here, which is that your compatriot in drive-through looked out the window and saw people who didn't look like him and so naturally assumed that therefore Roslindale is one big ghetto and so of course it's violent. That is a racist assumption of which I hope I have finally disabused you. And if I haven't, then perhaps you need to keep introspecting a little more.
I hear you
Look Gareth, I hear what your are saying.
All I am saying is that I don't think a racist comment was made, UNTIL you started in with the "fear of brown people" stuff. Can you at least respect that point of view? I don't have any problem with you, and likely don't live more than a couple miles away from you.
I have no problem with your neighborhood, and I don't personally don't think that Roslindale, in general, is a ghetto. I was just defending another person's right to imply that it is dirty and generally unlovely, without being called racist for his trouble.
Ok?
Well, we'll just have to disagree then
I think that racist comments were made in the post I responded to. And that's why I responded to it. Furthermore, if you think my comments about fear of the brown were racist, then perhaps you need to do some reading about what "racism" means, because you've got a very uncommon understanding of it. Pointing out racism is not itself racism any more than pointing out a car accident is causing one.
You can stick to your point of view if you want, but I won't stop telling you you're blind and hoping you'll learn.
Sorry, but I think you lose this round
The original comment went a bit farther than challenging "the cultural vitality of Roslindale." The guy didn't say Roslindale has nothing to do at night, he said we shouldn't be surprised people get stabbed here because "that place is a hole." Based on the sort of anonymous comments made here about crime and minorities, it's not too far of a stretch to think what else was really going through the guy's mind.
Perhaps
Maybe you're right, but see my response to Gareth above for why I disagree.
What's wrong with Brown people?
I mean, not everyone can get into Harvard or Yale. Besides, Providence is a pretty cool place too.
Ba
da boom
Ron shoots
He scores!
lol
n/t
"I only read UH to seen the
"I only read UH to seen the insane nonsense people, in their mildly interesting lives, try to put out as being important."
And I bet you only look at Penthouse for the articles, right?
Why bother reading Penthouse
Why bother reading Penthouse when you can get it all distilled online? If I wanted to read medicore writing, I'd read blogs...oh wait... ;)
This post is incredibly
This post is incredibly histrionic.
Moving on...
i say good riddens. people
i say good riddens. people like you that have nothing better to than to comment on stories you don't even know are true should really dig a deep hole and bury yourself in it!!
What are "riddens" ?
and why are they good?