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A Visit from St. Nicholas in Allston

'Tis the season, and this photo got Matthew Nash to thinking about what it all means:

'Twas the night before Allston Christmas & all through Beantown
not a six-pack was stirring, for they'd all been down'd.

The U-Hauls were parked & loaded with crap
under the windshield a parking ticket flap'd.

Students lay exhausted, mattress on the floor
towel and toothbrush in a box by the door.

The parking cops & meter maids holstered their books
while the landlords cashed in their checks, like crooks.

Sunrise on the Charles shone down on a clatter
a wrecked moving truck causing a Storrow disaster.

To the vans! The hungover students crawled
on the sidewalk their boxes and trash bags were sprawled.

As if they had never driven before
these students swerved wildly from door to door.

Down Comm Ave, down Beacon, past Harvard, to Cleveland
Circle they dash'd, forgetting all reason.

Up stairs and down, they haul their possessions
happily rid of old roommate obsessions.

Fretting the deposit, return the U-Haul in haste.

Then, suddenly, there's a whole afternoon to waste.

To the packie they run, narrow streets they explore
sidewalk treasures infested with bedbugs and more.

Broken speakers, some records and a really ugly lamp.

What the heck is a Couger Mellencamp?

Wandering, they're lost, Allston is so confusing.

Do you remember what T stop we're using?

Checking their phones, they're lost in Brookline
so they take the trolley from Coolidge to the B-line.

Back at the house, toss some plates in a cabinet.

Did anyone remember to set up the internet?

No movies to watch, no memes to enjoy
to the front porch, the stoop, and sidewalk they deploy.

Drinking beer. More beer! and pizza aplenty

Wait! Did you just tip the driver a twenty?

Exhausted, they wave as he drives out of sight

It's Allston Christmas, brah! I'm getting stupid tonight!!!



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From 2015:

'Twas the last night of August,
On North Harvard Street
The students were stirring
Tevas on their feet

The traffic was snarled,
Kenmore Square was a mess,
As students with smartphones
Navigated by guess.

And mamma with her vodka
And I with my Coors
Had just settled our brains
For a warm night outdoors

When out on the street
There arose such a scuffle
I sprang from my chair
To go see the kerfuffle

(somebody else is going to have to finish this, I'm in meetings the rest of the day, and couldn't find a verse where I could shoehorn in "plague of bedbugs")

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[Dumpster Diving] [Freeganism] A list of ideas, hints, tips, pointers how to avoid bedbugs in reclaiming curbside recyclables around Boston, Allston, Cambridge, Somerville, Jamaica Plain, Brookline, Charlestown https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freeganism for example a) Don't do it, don't reclaim recyclables.

b) Only reclaim recyclables that couldn't conceal bedbugs, problematical for folks unknowlegeable about bedbug behaviors.

c) Only reclaim intact containers of liquids for cleaning that couldn't conceal bedbugs.

d) ...

e) ...

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"I got a bedbug."

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Labor Day weekend is late this year... Sadly I'm around today and don't take off from my normal GTFO'ah the city trip to the woods untill 4am tomorrow.

Lots of trucks and box cars, but didn't seem too bad around 7am. I'm guessing it'll pick up after they get some avacado toasts and bloody Mary's in them.

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are you aware of an establishment that sells btoth of them? because that would be great,

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