Man uses fake dough to buy pastries
By adamg on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 9:43am
Norwood Police want to stop a local counterfeiter before he gets on a roll: They've posted photos of the tough cookie after he hit a local bakery with bogus bread on Wednesday:
Purchased two low priced pastries separately for $16-$18 dollars in change.
Police say employees became suspicious when they realized the pastry-faced man was handing them half-baked currency "done unprofessionally on an ink jet printer." They add he showed up later in the day to try to exchange more of the non-money for treats and change.
If you know where police can find this marzipain, call 781-440-5100.
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I hope they baguette the
I hope they baguette the offender
Makes me think of this Abbot and Costello routine
Loafing:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A78I0Vlgivw
Ripping off a bakery is on
Ripping off a bakery is on the list of things you just doughnut do.
He looks croissant-eyed
*clears throat*
I used to be a pilot in a bakery. I'd take the bread from one corner and pilot in another. I quit that job because I got sick of the dough. I decided to loaf for a few months. It was a half-baked idea. As cash became scarce, I became crusty. Donut always seem to go you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone? Ah, well, I've always been a gluten for punishment...
I went to a bar and got pie-eyed. Since I was short-stacked, how did I buy the rye? The money was stollen. I know it was wrong, but I kneaded it.
I saw a tart at the end of the bar. Nice buns. I suggested we go back to my place and get frosted. Her eyes glazed. She said, "You're the batarde who robbed my brother Pita! The yeast you could do is not cause us any more pain! Anyway, I know you batter your wife!"
I was going to give her a pizza my mind, but she was right. I was a crumb. I decided I'd be leaven her alone. Maybe later, after she cooled off, I'd send her some flours.
Somebody ask me why there's butter on my pants...
(Seriously, somebody ask me.)
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
Tipping my "French Toast
Tipping my "French Toast Alert: Elevated", Christmas hat to a Pun Master!
Thank You, But...
Ask me why I have butter on my pants.
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
My Kingdom For A Straight Man
Sheesh. It's because I'm on a roll, motherf***er.
OK, I'm toast. It's Friday afternoon. Let's go get blintzed.
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
But wait. If you're *on* the
But wait. If you're *on* the roll, wouldn't that make *you* the butter? Or is there something else on the roll (you) which has butter on top of it? Like, you're ham or something?
All of a sudden, I'm confused.
Ham?
Guilty as charged.
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
LOL. I sets 'em up, you
LOL. I sets 'em up, you knocks 'em down.
The Comedy Stylings of Scratchie & Suldog
We'll be here all week.
Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
Is this the real life version of the Itchy & Scratchie show?
n/t